SKILL #2
Asking Questions
Don’t be a “self-talker” !
Believe it or not, in most relationships, one person typically does more than 75% of the talking! Use these tips to not only avoid being a self-talker, but to help you get to know who you’re going out with better.
-
Avoid closed questions (requires only a yes or no response). Boring! And creates uncomfortable silence.
-
Ask Open Ended questions: “Tell me about your game” (leaves a lot of room for response) vs. “How was your game?” (probably will get a much shorter answer, such as the score, or just “good”).
-
Wait for an answer! Don’t be thinking of the next thing you want to say while they’re talking.
-
Ask questions that are about more than just facts, such as opinions, values or ideas. These questions start with ‘What do you think about…..(could be anything from something that happened at school to the latest breakup) or “If you had a choice, would you…..(go to college or work, sky dive or go to the beach).
For the brave and the more mature, try playing the question game. It’s simple. Each person comes up with 5 questions they want to know about the other person. You take turns asking, and each person MUST answer, and answer honestly. Questions should be all over the place, from favorite color to who would you want to be if you weren’t yourself!
Play once a week and see what happens!!
SKILL #3
PLAY THE QUESTION GAME
Be direct if you have something serious to ask. DO NOT say something like “ I kinda want to know….” Words like ‘kinda’, ‘sort of’, ‘maybe’ don’t reflect that you need a serious and honest answer.
 |
|
SKILL #4
Recognize Gender Differences in Conversation |
